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Family, work, friends, fantasy football..I mean, who has the time to keep up with all the political happenings? Who would blame you for prioritizing your family with the election more than 400 days away? Lucky for you, dear reader, I quit fantasy football years ago, so I was able to allocate the time usually applied in mock drafts to keep tabs on the presidential, political goings-on. Did something happen over the weekend that you will forever regret not witnessing in real time??

Of course not. The election is more than a year away. But a few noteworthy1)by noteworthy, I mean campaign fodder that could help you look clever in your next politico-water cooler conversation events took place. And because we love our readers, we aggregated all the info you need (and perhaps a little extra).

 

Donald Trump shows Charlie Sheen what “Winning” really means

The2)The Clear Counsel Law Blog remains your go-to source for dated pop-culture references…well second to the VH1 candidates attended the Iowa State Fair this past weekend; a fun event where technocrats pretend they understand regular folks by trying to eat fried food without grimacing3)The fair seriously is a whole lot of fun, highly recommended, especially in campaign season. With a quick perusal of the news from the weekend, you will find photos of Gov. Bush, Sec. Clinton, and Donald Trump eating a pork chop on a stick. In a normal election cycle, the story would be about Gov. Walker being interrupted by union protesters as he attempted to answer questions from his soapbox, as opposed to this peculiar explanation of his hair line:

 

Per usual, Mr. Trump has no interest in ceding any free media to his fellow candiddates, so he brought his helicopter and offered free rides from the state fair parking lot to interested children.

 

To ensure that no other candidate would pick up any media coverage this weekend, Mr. Trump joined his press equivalent4)please draw what conclusions you like on Meet the Press, and it was as fabulous5)if you write politics for a living/horrible6)if you care for America’s image at home and abroad as you are assuming it was.  Luckily, Chris Cillizza7)Read the piece here, it is pretty great. (of The Fix. Follow him on Twitter at @thefix) annotated the Donald Trump/Chuck Todd conversation from Meet the Press. The written transcript is as great as the video footage. Please allow me excerpt two of my favorite exchanges. Don’t worry, the context is irrelevant.

 

CHUCK TODD:
We do have a running theme here. You believe the U.S. should-- you're okay with the U.S. being the world's police--

DONALD TRUMP:
We should at least--

(OVERTALK)

DONALD TRUMP:
--be reimbursed--

CHUCK TODD:
--if we get paid--

DONALD TRUMP:
--by these extremely wealthy countries, yes--

CHUCK TODD:
So essentially you want--

DONALD TRUMP:
Chuck, we--

(OVERTALK)

CHUCK TODD:
It turns our--

DONALD TRUMP:
We have--

CHUCK TODD:
--military into a mercenary force.

 

Oh yes, it happened again.

 

CHUCK TODD:
I understand that. But--

DONALD TRUMP:
They moved to--

CHUCK TODD:
--Mexico--

DONALD TRUMP:
--Mexico--

CHUCK TODD:
They're not doing--

DONALD TRUMP:
I don't care how they're--

CHUCK TODD:
--better.

DONALD TRUMP:
I don't care how they're doing as a country--

CHUCK TODD:
They're doing worse.

DONALD TRUMP:
I'm just saying they're killing us. Because everybody's moving into Mexico.

CHUCK TODD:
There are people that argue NAFTA was terrible for them.

DONALD TRUMP:
Mexico is doing an unbelievable job. Mexico is taking our business. Mexico is the new China, okay? Look at the--

CHUCK TODD:
Where is the evidence of this?

DONALD TRUMP:
It's all over the place. Chuck--

CHUCK TODD:
Their GDP is smaller--

DONALD TRUMP:
Chuck.

CHUCK TODD:
This is--

DONALD TRUMP:
They're moving companies--

CHUCK TODD:
The peso, it is--

DONALD TRUMP:
That is true--

CHUCK TODD:
--worth less today. I mean--

DONALD TRUMP:
And you know what?

CHUCK TODD:
That's not the sign of--

DONALD TRUMP:
And, Chuck--

CHUCK TODD:
--a strong economy.

 

So8)there is not anything I can add to the above exchanges. They are perfect, as is. you probably heard that Megyn Kelly took a previously unannounced, 2 week respite from her nightly show, upon a secret conversation between Mr. Trump and Mr. Ailes9)who runs the Fox News. Given all this negative media attention, particularly since the debate, you would think Mr. Trump’s poll numbers would be deflated?

Guess again.

Mr. Trump is blowing out the competition. At some point, we will need to try to figure out how/why this is happening. Fellow billionaire/egomaniac10)I say that with peace and love Mark Cuban stated why he feels, not only why Mr. Trump is doing so well, but why Mr. Trump is “probably the best thing to happen in politics in a long long time.”

"I don't care what his actual positions are," Cuban wrote. "I don't care if he says the wrong thing. He says what's on his mind. He gives honest answers rather than prepared answers. This is more important than anything any candidate has done in years."

Indeed, the outspoken investor said Trump "changed the game."

"Up until Trump announced his candidacy the conventional wisdom was that you had to be a professional politician in order to run," Cuban continued. "You had to have a background that was politically scrubbed. In other words, smart people who didn't live perfect lives could never run. Smart people who didn't want their families put under the media spotlight wouldn't run. The Donald is changing all of that. He has changed the game and for that he deserves a lot of credit."11)source.

 

Please read that first sentence again. Has this always been true of voters? Or has something happened in our politics where a strong plurality of voters care less for political positions than supposed authenticity? We will need to put a pin in that inquiry for now.

Of course, New York City summoned Mr. Trump for jury duty today. He, obviously, did not want to take attention away from the judicial process, so he arrived early, entering quietly through a side entrance. Oh wait, that would be absurd.

https://twitter.com/ABCPolitics/status/633305371520724993/photo/1

 

Wait, are you saying we have two political parties??

As much as the lamestream media would like to pretend, the winner of the Republican nomination will not be automatically anointed President. S/he will have to run a general election campaign against the Democratic nominee12)from their stances of ‘deport all immigrants, including all children, relatives, and attenuated friends’ to promulgating that ‘vaccines cause autism’ to ‘abortion is unacceptable, even to for a 10 year old girl that was raped,’ I am not convinced the republican candidates are aware that their primary is not the final round of voting. By the way, I only made up one of those three positions. Not that I particularly care about their policy stances, but one must assume that the political machine that turned Mitt Romney into Gordon Gecko last election cycle will have a field day with these less-than-mainstream political views..

In the backdrop of Gov. Jeb13)Did you know that JEB is an acronym for John Ellis Bush?!? How did I just learn of this? He is the ATM Machine of presidential candidates! Bush’s visit to North Las Vegas last week in which “Black Lives Matter” protesters interrupted the end of his presentation, Secretary Clinton will be in North Las Vegas tomorrow (around noon). Will she be interrupted as well? Sen. Booker was in Las Vegas yesterday as a surrogate speaker for Secretary Clinton. At the event, he addressed the concerns of a few questioners regarding institutional racism, but will that be sufficient? The event opened with an one-act play, so clearly, we all missed out. Read more about it here.

The AFL-CIO hosts their convention from the Luxor/Excalibur Tuesday and Wednesday. Secretary Clinton, Gov. O’Malley, and Sen. Sanders are scheduled to speak tomorrow, Tuesday. The event is less likely to be interrupted by protesters, as not even media members are permitted to attend14)Obviously, so that they can plan their Fall affront to everything Sean Hannity finds dear.

For some reason, the only lamestream press Sen. Sanders receives regards the couple of instances his events have been interrupted by “Black Lives Matter” protesters15)asking my writer brothers and sisters to investigate why Sen. Sanders, as an independent-socialist, draws 10X (at least) the number of voters at his rallies, relative to anyone else running for president, must be too much to ask. Maybe these folks were duped into thinking there was going to be a flash-drum circle? There is no way to tell until someone actually asks the people why they arrive to see Sen. Sanders and no one else. Charles Blow wrote a nice analysis of awkwardness between Bernie supporters and the “Black Lives Matter” folks, if you desire some well-thought-out concepts on the issues, as opposed to the usual name-calling on the twitter. Also, in case you were worried, Sen. Sanders knows all about #BernieSoBlack

 

Before we go, a little political humor from Dana Gould16)Hey, not a lot of Harvard Law grads look like a character from The Munsters; Sen. Cruz should be proud!

Footnotes

Footnotes
1 by noteworthy, I mean campaign fodder that could help you look clever in your next politico-water cooler conversation
2 The Clear Counsel Law Blog remains your go-to source for dated pop-culture references…well second to the VH1
3 The fair seriously is a whole lot of fun, highly recommended, especially in campaign season
4 please draw what conclusions you like
5 if you write politics for a living
6 if you care for America’s image at home and abroad
7 Read the piece here, it is pretty great.
8 there is not anything I can add to the above exchanges. They are perfect, as is.
9 who runs the Fox News
10 I say that with peace and love
11 source
12 from their stances of ‘deport all immigrants, including all children, relatives, and attenuated friends’ to promulgating that ‘vaccines cause autism’ to ‘abortion is unacceptable, even to for a 10 year old girl that was raped,’ I am not convinced the republican candidates are aware that their primary is not the final round of voting. By the way, I only made up one of those three positions. Not that I particularly care about their policy stances, but one must assume that the political machine that turned Mitt Romney into Gordon Gecko last election cycle will have a field day with these less-than-mainstream political views.
13 Did you know that JEB is an acronym for John Ellis Bush?!? How did I just learn of this? He is the ATM Machine of presidential candidates!
14 Obviously, so that they can plan their Fall affront to everything Sean Hannity finds dear
15 asking my writer brothers and sisters to investigate why Sen. Sanders, as an independent-socialist, draws 10X (at least) the number of voters at his rallies, relative to anyone else running for president, must be too much to ask. Maybe these folks were duped into thinking there was going to be a flash-drum circle? There is no way to tell until someone actually asks the people why they arrive to see Sen. Sanders and no one else.
16 Hey, not a lot of Harvard Law grads look like a character from The Munsters; Sen. Cruz should be proud!
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